a letter to my younger body

Dear Zamo,
Remember the girl you liked so much in your first-year? Ja, the third-year you occasionally hung out with from the floor above you. After spending a majority of your life dating guys, I wish someone had been there to see you through a same-sex relationship. The drama, the tears, the judgement…all of it, if only we could turn back the hands of time and just make people understand that although you were not homophobic, you did not consider yourself a homosexual. It was just her.

Confusion is a deadly serpent. Remember that claim you held so dear? Indeed, not only were you bombarded with the transition from high school to varsity, but you were confronted with feelings you didn’t know even existed; your close friend, confusion, being one of them. If there was a way to avoid the stares that you believed were piercing your back as you entered the Kaif, you know I would help you. Alas, what’s in the past shall stay there, we can only enjoy what tomorrow brings.

Of course the relationship was not built on turmoil, or else you wouldn’t have stuck around for that long, but the awkward “should-I-hold-your-hand?” moments were like a child caught playing in the dark. So the Rhodes experience got you down, but she couldn’t have come at a better time in your life. She taught you more than you could ever know. If I were there I’d advise you to stick to her. Those who do not approve are but only a jealous bunch.

Have a splashing first year…